feeling down

So when I started my search I didn't think it would be this hard and this long. I mean when I first decided to do it again after having baby Tai. I was basically found by my last IP's. Seriously it wasn't even from my add. It was seeing me on smo in my siggy. I got an email and the rest was history. Well until the chose to stop after things didn't got as good as we wished.
So since then I have basically been told I will be very hard to match. Most Ip's want you to have insurance (I understand that but I have since found some to use). I have been told because I had 3 csec, ok well my peri oked me. Since I had GD before, ok but it was controlled by diet not insulin, that my age turns some down, well it's just a year and half older than my last delivery and well heck I can't get younger lol, and my weight, this is not as easy to loose. UGH. After all the meds and babies it's sticking to me like glue. I have tried really I have. I did loose a few but there is more I could loose. The thing is I have been this weight or there about for a few years now and it's never been an issue with the REs they have oked me it's not caused me not to get pg.
I know I am not the "best option" but I'm not the worst either. I know I once they got a chance to know me they would like me. I am am dependable, loyal, loving, funny (ok maybe not to all.lol) caring and giving. I stick by you and give you hope when your feeling down. I lend an ear when you just need to vent. I hold your hand when your scared of what is to come and I jump for joy when you get the best news ever. I am a great surrogate to have. Just need someone to have the chance to know me.

On another note. My TS babe is not a babe anymore. He turns 15 next week!! I just can't even believe how time has flown by since becoming a surrogate.